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About a month ago, one of my sisters tagged me in a video she recorded of Family Feud—a game show where two families compete for a cash prize by trying to find the most popular answers to a variety of questions.
On the episode of the daytime game show she recorded, host and comedian Steve Harvey asks the contestants to answer a rather loaded statement: “Name a reason a woman might decide to be with a chubby [or fat] man.” This, as one might imagine, ends up being a rather humorous round for the contestants, Steve Harvey, and the audience.
More specifically, this myth assumes that all fat men are inherently less attractive to all people than any partner they could ever have.
That partner is only using fat men to appear more attractive by comparison.
In some ways, this myth is contradictory with another myth that claims fat men only want to be with traditionally attractive people.
Primarily, though, it’s important and unfortunately necessary that fat men will be attracted to a wide variety of people of all shapes and sizes, and the same goes for fat women.
This myth makes the assumption that, as mentioned above, no one could conceivably be in a relationship with a fat man because they’re actually attracted to him.
Fat people are simply tools to achieve a higher sense of desirability to potential future partners.
But it’s much easier for people to understand two skinny/traditionally attractive people being together because they’re attracted to each other than when a skinny/traditionally attractive person chooses to be with a fat man for other, less superficial reasons.This kind of thought is extremely damaging for a lot of fat men, placing all of their value as people into the money or power they may or may not have.While there are, of course, some people who only seek relationships for money or power, the truth of the matter is that quite often, people will choose to be with a fat man because they actually want to be with him.This blatant objectification of fat men’s bodies is the result of what the above myths have done to remove any other positive aspects of what we think of when we look at fat men.The only redeeming quality our culture puts forth for fat men—if they aren’t rich or powerful, and not even 100% of the time—is that they’re like fluffy teddy bears as opposed to, you know, human beings with other desires.